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  • Writer's pictureKelly Marks

Trust Issues

One of the assignments in the improv class I’m taking is to come up with a character- complete with accent, mannerisms, and comprehensive backstory. And that’s how Trish was born.

Trish is a Girl Scout leader, and she’s very serious. One eyebrow is always dipped lower than the other in what looks like a perpetual scowl; she always has three fingers up in the Girl Scout salute, and she is always, always, always prepared. Just like a good Girl Scout should be. It’s even in their motto: be prepared.

Trish came about easily because I was a Girl Scout leader for 13 years, and I have a natural scowl!. I got involved (I prefer to use the term “suckered in” because of Madison). I stayed because Julie, the other leader, and I had so much fun. We took the girls on field trips, worked on badges, put on events for other girls, and we went camping along with many other things.

Camping is where the preparedness came into play. We took tents, sleeping bags, flashlights, first aid kits, food, fire, rain gear because it rained every single time we camped, first aid (yes again).

Julie and I had to get certified in numerous things including fire safety, cooking over an open flame (we once cooked for 27 people over a campfire), tying knots, among other things. As leaders we were trained to back our cars in when we arrived at the campsite. That way if there was an emergency we could drive out faster going forward than having to waste time backing out. Now that’s being prepared.

,I find that trait of being prepared is pretty natural to me. Even today, I constantly have snacks, aspirin, safety pins, eye drops, and always Chapstick, and more in my purse. I could probably win on the TV show Let’s Make A Deal when they ask the audience if they have certain items in their purse or on them.

So when I decided to create this blog site, Paul told me I should go ahead and write some extra ones to have in the hopper. That way if I were busy or traveling or I just couldn’t get to it, I could still publish without having to panic. I completely agreed. Be prepared. Trouble is, as much as I have I’ve worked on doing just that, I can’t make it happen.

I can sit down to write the day's blog, and the words just flow out. It’s like they are coming from outside of myself, and I just have to get out of the way. Then I try to write the next one, and I can’t get past the first sentence.

Yesterday I spent all day long trying to finish a blog post about the beauty of autumn this year, and it just wasn’t working. Nothing seemed to tie it all together. I was frustrated. I really didn’t want the pressure of writing the blog in between church and my last improv class today, but it was not meant to be.

This morning I got up with nothing, and the words came tumbling out again. This might just be God's way of teaching me to trust.

There’s no reason to have faith and trust when you have an essay at the ready or three standing by. I have to admit that I really don’t like this lesson, but then again I rarely do. I’ve never had a lesson about how to eat cake or take a nap. I’m already pretty good at those. Apparently, faith and trust is where I need a little work.

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