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  • Writer's pictureKelly Marks


There are so many personality tests out there. A lot of companies use these in the corporate culture to help employees understand themselves a little better, enable them to work better with others, and to work more efficiently.

Myers-Briggs is the big one; it’s been around since 1943. Then there’s DISC, the Big Five, Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory, and Enneagram. I’ve read through several of them and have actually done a couple. I always turn out to be extroverted. It’s safe to say I love getting together with friends or even people who are yet to be friends. I get energy from it. There are no parameters. It can be casual or formal, planned or spontaneous.

I was thrilled when I received an invitation for this past Friday for dinner at 6 o’clock with the Precious Pearls. I usually know what to expect at these get-togethers, and I’ve never been disappointed.

In the afternoon, I took my time as I showered and dressed. One does not rush to get ready for this kind of event. Right before leaving, I slipped on black patent leather flats, put on pearls and lip gloss. I felt like I could’ve been getting ready for dinner sometime in the 1950s. It felt like I was in a movie. It felt special, and I wasn’t even there yet.

Upon arrival we were all greeted with a hug that said, “We’ve been waiting for you. You are integral to this evening.“ Immediately I was offered a beverage of my choosing and a comfortable seat. Soon appetizers appeared and were shared. They were homemade and amazing.

Conversation flowed as we nibbled and soon we were led to the table where a beautiful glass bowl of hydrangeas took center stage only to be graced on either side with crystal candelabras. Not a detail had been overlooked.

Dinner was served by the hostess and each guest was forbidden, yes, forbidden from getting up to refill drinks, clear plates, or anything else. We were not just guests but honored guests, and we were certainly made to feel that way.

As I listened to the stories being told and the conversation being shared, I realized this was so much more than food with friends, or even dinner together. This was an honest-to-goodness dinner party. The kind you read about in books or see in the movies.

The younger generation might order pizza and have people over, sit outside with paper, plates, napkins, and crack open a beer, and I think that’s amazing and important. Things don’t have to be polished and buttoned up to spend time with others, but I think if we never host or attend a dinner party such as this, we’re losing something vital. The hostess spent countless hours planning and executing this work of art, and it was most assuredly a work of art. I have no doubt she fell into bed, exhausted at the end of the evening, and I would never want that for her. But I also see what she was doing. Six women, precious pearls, walked out into the evening afterward, feeling loved and cared for in a million little ways.

Spending time with our friends and the people we love is fun and needed and certainly never to be denigrated, but going the extra mile to make someone feel cherished is in a different class entirely.

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